more of the same...

       so the theologian's recent post brought my attention to the current trend around xanga to show body pictures as a sort of "i love my body" campaign. no, i will not be participating this time around. i've certainly made a lot of progress since late december, but... no way. i have every intention of showing off my abs when i reclaim them (don't hold your breath). i'm just not there yet.

       the kitties are running around and playing together in their uber-cute way and it makes me sad that i'm going to be separating them in just over two weeks. is it weird that this is heartbreaking to me? i remember how clingy hermes got after just a weekend here when we lived in columbia. i know they'll adjust. but still, it's like tearing best friends apart. i feel like a selfish asshole.

       two of my high school classmates have asked me recently if we we're going to have a ten-year reunion soon (yes, i'm old). i was class president so for some reason they think that's my job to organize that kind of stuff. frankly, my dears, i don't give a damn. i started trying to forget about that place the day i graduated. i currently keep up with two of my classmates (not the same two), and i'm related to one of those.

       i'd really like to see toby before i move because i haven't seen him in ages, but we're having scheduling problems and i've been kinda surprised by how sad that's making me. i wish i'd have met him when i was in a different/better place in my life. the really sad thing is that i can say that for more than just him. i should just stop meeting people so that i'm not in weird places in life and avoid the things not working out thing altogether. ohh. my heart hurts now.

       two weeks and a day. that's how much time i have left to pack/organize/store/move. i'm not only going through all the stuff from columbia, but all of my storage items from the first seventeen years of my life as well. there is shit everywhere and it's driving me crazy. also trying to jump through all the new job hoops, like talking to h.r. and scheduling pee tests. also trying to get things ready in raleigh, and trying to sell my old car, which is not happening and my father is threatening to haul it off for scrap metal, and i'm still working nearly full time and trying to go to the gym 3-5 times a week. don't ask how much i'm actually getting done. i'm starting to worry a little.

       i'm still in my gym clothes. i need a shower and a bed. goodnight.